My Non-intrusive and Non-imposing Spaghetti Recipe

Spaghetti Noodles - add a pinch of salt and teaspoon of olive oil

Tomato Sauce- sauteed ripe tomatoes (1/4 kilo), with a little onion, garlic, salt, sili, ground pepper, and a quarter liter of del monte tomato sauce.

Meat- 1/2 kilo beef, sauteed till crunchy (w/o oil) with finely sliced onion, garlic, and sili.

Cheese- grated cheese.

*Serve all "components" separately.

Do not ask how it tastes. Do not impose on anyone who doesn't want to eat. Do not dictate how the "components" should be put together. Respect other person's privacy while eating. Serve coke with ice quietly.

The Inquisitive Daughter

"Mommy, why am I walking around in circles?"

"Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot."

=====

"Mommy, why is daddy running so fast?"

"Shut up, just reload the shotgun."

Erap

Pag na-convict si Erap, ang tamang parusa ay ang i-enrol sya sa Pisay.

Vertigo

Challenge kay David Blaine:

Ang susunod nyang stunt, i-renounce nya ang kanyang American citizenship, magpa-naturalized Filipino at tumira sya sa Payatas ng isang linggo.